Obsession
by Amata19
Summary: Zephyr was angry. Very angry. She would find him, and she would demand answers.
1. Alone

**Disclaimer: I own none of the Matrix.**

**A/N: This story is set in between the first Matrix and Reloaded. **

The world was gone. All gone. Flown away, speckles of dust and crumpled litter in a high wind. Only the dust was left, and the tracks of the light.

He had left, gone without a trace, so there wasn't much of a world to Zephyr. He was what kept her going, he always talked about purpose, and without him she felt she had none. Deep in her heart, she knew that the idea was ludicrous; she did not need him to live, that smooth, sadistic program. She did not need anyone that would leave her in the flutter of an eyelash like that, leaving her alone and fighting off a shit storm of tears.

She looked around the room with eyes that held no life, she was not really seeing. The memories were playing in front of her eyes, plunging her deeply, painfully into the past. A tear coursed down her cheek, and dripped off her chin, landing silently on her hand, leaving its silent splash mark of pain.

All that time, wasted. He said he hated humans, but he had acted more human today than ever. He had been irrational, simply leaving on a whim.

Zephyr hated him. Hated his name, hated his face. She hated his gorgeous, azure eyes. She sighed deeply and looked around, really seeing for the first time.

"God damn you." She spat, trying so desperately to feel angry at him, but only feeling her love, seeming stronger than ever.

She had taken care of him, when he needed her. He had been so weak, so god damn pathetic and drivelling. He had been reluctant to let her help him at first, but he was so weak and strength less, he had finally let himself be helped. This was the thanks she got for helping him in his time of need?. She would show him, she would show him that she did not deserve to be treated this way.

Zephyr picked herself up off the dusty floor, but as soon as she stood, her strength abandoned her. She fell to her knees, kicking up a plume of dust. Then the real tears came, flowing from her eyes and drizzling down her wet, swollen cheeks.

Her whole body was shaking violently as she cried, she brought her hands up to her face with some effort, but they offered no comfort, they were shuddering like the rest of her.

She let herself fall sideways onto the dusty floor, still crying and shaking forcefully in a shape similar to the foetal position.

The wind gusted outside, and Zephyr sat up shakily, the tears had stopped now, but her whole face was swollen with the force they had brought.

She was looking deeply at the ground, as if the particles of dust resting there silently interested her deeply. Eventually, she turned her face away, looking towards the door to which Smith had left through.

She viewed that door with contempt, she hated it's battered, rusty look.

She stood up, and for the moment her weak and shaky legs supported her weight. She moved to the large glass window and looked out with green eyes that were full of pain.

"It was not wise to leave it this way, Smith, it was not wise to hurt me. Not wise at all."


	2. Dreamer

**Disclaimer: I own none of the matrix.**

Wings fluttering. Tears flowing. Feathers falling. This was the dream she kept having.

There was more, but whenever Zephyr awoke from it slick with sweat and breathing in burning, terrified woops, it was all she could remember.

She awoke from this dream again one night, bolting upright and breathing rapidly, looking around with eyes that would not settle on one spot.

For one frightening moment, she didn't know where she was, and felt her sanity begin to crack and buckle under a considerable weight, then it all came back, like a crack on the forehead, and she fell heavily backwards, kicking up small plumes of dust.

_Where are you, Smith? Damn it, where the fuck are you?! _She screamed in her mind, as she brought her fist down on the beaten floor, kicking up more ancient dust.

She turned over, glaring furiously at nothing, thinking over and over of her mingled hatred and love for the man, thinking how sleep would forever be haunted by terrible dreams too horrible to remember, when her anger melted away like ice under the blazing, cruel, sun and she slipped silently towards a dreamless sleep.

-----------------

When she awoke, she felt blazing and full with violent life, and she was surprised to feel cold, very cold indeed. Her love for Smith was still there, but it was buried very deep inside, hiding fearfully from the shadow of her rage. Ka, it seemed, did not like Smith at all this day, and it would decide, as it always did, whether her hands would grip around his neck today, or next week.

And as she dressed, Zephyr was very glad to feel the glint in her eye and the smile on her face.

Today was going to be a very good day indeed. She could feel it.

As she left the ramshackle building which she had stormed into the previous night, she could only feel better. It was a beautiful day, artificial or not, and a pleasant sky and a warm wind always cheered her heart, even if it was already cheered with it's thumping, sadistic, hate.

She smiled to herself, looking around at the waking world, feeling some weird kind if joy, and with dawning realization, she realized, the sun had seemed to have awakened her burning affection for Smith, and now her rage was the one to cower. Ka was fickle, oh yes, and maybe this would be a good day, but not for her, for _him_.

This thought brought great fear to her heart, in Zephyr's long life, she had never really lost. Of course there had been small losses, losses were necessary and Ka never favoured one soul for long. But in the Great Scheme of Life, Zephyr had never been a loser. Now she feared the great wheel of Ka was beginning to turn again, and it was turning against her with raw determination.

_Don't stand there fretting, Z!. If Ka means you to fail, then fail you shall, no matter what you do. Don't just stand there with fear beating at your heart, move along and try. The only sin is not to try. _ A rough voice said, and Zephyr recognized it instantly.

Reluctantly, with fear still beating relentlessly at her heart, Zephyr moved silently, towards the outer city.


	3. Fear In A Handful Of Dust

**Disclaimer: I own none of the Matrix.**

**A/N: I'm really glad this is getting such good reviews.. and from such talented people, too!. Thank you very much. **

The wheel of Ka was turning indeed, Zephyr could almost hear it as it turned round and round, each spoke as strong as it ever was, she could sense that it was turning against her, and in favour of Smith.

With growing fear and anxiety, she drew closer to the outer city, away from most of the choked traffic, and bustling, ignorant Coppertops, but she was no longer sure she was heading towards her goal.

_Maybe this is Ka's way, _She thought, sliding steadily towards panic, _Sending me not only the wrong way, but into the waste lands of the outer city, where I will surely die by a stray bullet or some awful disease for which there is no cure. _

Zephyr tried to push that thought away, she knew it was useless to think such things, but it would not budge. It was gnawing relentlessly at her considerable courage, slowly turning it into small, insignificant flecks which could be blown away by a strong wind.

_I will not lose! I will not die! I refuse it! Not now, because of this man, not by the hands of the Program! Never! Fuck you, Ka! Fuck you straight to hell! _Zephyr thought childishly, ignoring an inner voice which told her to stop giving in to her fear, and lift her head up and show Ka that she would go down fighting, if it was Ka's will that she should die.

All coherent thought was being denied now, her fear was too great, and was steadily developing into raw terror.

Then a racing thought came with such whip-cracking force that Zephyr stumbled back two steps and almost fell to the ground.

_Damn _you_ to hell if you give in!. _The Voice screamed, _Do you not see that fear is not only beating at your heart but at your soul, too?. And what do you do? You let it eat at you! This love of yours has made you weak, Zephyr! No wonder Ka is turning against you, Ka has never favoured the weak!. Cast aside your love and embrace your rage, for your love makes you as pathetic and drivelling as he was when you first found him!. Is that what you want?._

That thought struck home, and although Zephyr doubted if she could just cast aside an emotion that seemed to be everywhere within her, an emotion that seemed to fill her world with a goodness that was never there, but she would at least let it fade into the recesses of shadows, and maybe there it would seem to have less control. Smith had been right about something, it seemed, love was a weakness, a virus within a virus.

Grimacing and fighting against a bitter wind that seemed to whisper a thousand names in a thousand different languages, Zephyr moved on, and for once, unknowingly passed under the great looming shadow of Ka.


	4. The Dead Zone

**Disclaimer: I own none of the Matrix.**

**A/N: The phrase 'The Dead Zone' is not mine, I borrowed it, it's a title of a Stephen King book, but I thought it was very appropriate. Also, I meant to say before that 'fear in a handful of dust' isn't mine... it belongs to T.S Eliot.**

A chill raced down her spine, making her shudder briskly as she walked slowly against the wind, her long coat flying out behind her, flapping and cursing at the gale which tried to fling it from her shoulders.

Zephyr glanced around her, and what she saw chilled her heart.

_This must be hell. Got to be. Surely no place such as this can exist outside of that child's nightmare. _She thought, as her eyes scanned over the towering, crumbling wrecks which at one point, had been prosperous business and warm family homes. This place was desolation. There was simply no other word for this skeleton of a community. There was no sign of life; the only sounds were the howling, angry wind and the sound of paper and other materials scraping over the dead ground as they flew in the gale.

_The Dead Zone. _Zephyr thought, and shuddered.

She carried on fighting with the wind for a while longer, her head down, and her long, platted, raven hair flying and snapping behind her, but this wind was viscous, it was biting relentlessly at her cheeks with ice pick teeth, but they would soon be as numb as the rest of her.

_Got to find shelter. _She thought distantly, clenching her eyes shut as the wind howled and tried to push her away.

She looked around her, trying to spot somewhere that looked as if it wasn't going to fall down on her and crush her with its crumbling plaster in the dead of night.

Finally, after a few more moments, she saw a building that seemed to be sturdy enough, and made her way towards it. Unknown to her, she was heading deeper and deeper into Ka's shadow.

-

When she entered the building, and made her way to the dimly moon-lit corner, she saw a figure, sleeping silently in the shadows. She stopped cold, regarding the shadowy figure with growing anxiety.

_It's Death. He's finally come for me. After all these years of avoiding his curse, he has come for me. He will make me pay my dues. _She thought, as her feet unconsciously carried her towards the sleeping shadow.

The figure mumbled in it's rest, and slowly began to rise, but Zephyr's feet did not halt, they relentlessly carried her towards the man, her terror slowly rising inside her.

When the figure stepped into the light, what she saw was not Death, or her image of him, although this man had represented Death to many, for he hand killed many, and his hands were black with spilled blood.

Smith.

He had been found.

Dues would be paid tonight, but they would not be hers.


	5. The Coming Of Ka

**Disclaimer: I own none of the Matrix.**

**A/N: Sorry for the wait, I've had loads of work.**

Quietly drawing closer to the sleeping Program, Zephyr reached inside her long, swooping coat, as if for her gun, but as her hand touched the cold, deadly metal of it, she changed her mind.

A bullet, she thought, was merciful; she did not want Smith to feel a quick burst of pain, then dead before he even knew what was happening, she wanted him to suffer.

Oh, yes. What she had in mind would make what Neo had done to him look like God's Good Mercy.

Grinning, Zephyr stood next to him, her feet in front of his unprotected stomach, as she looked down with mingled hatred and love.

_You're not really going to do this, are you?_ A Voice in her mind asked. _Really, will you kill this man? I think not. You love him. _

Yes. That was true. But she would not let that stop her. The man deserved to suffer, if he did not have a good enough reason for deserting her, she would kill him.

Then, a thought occurred to Zephyr that caused her to grin as she watched Smith sleep, and that smile was taught with Evil.

_No,_ she thought. _What I'll do to him will make him _wish_ for the Mercy of death._

Her grin fading now, she stepped closer to him, the small stones and dirt gritting under her shoes.

She looked at him, feeling nothing but her rage now; she drew her foot back, and delivered a harsh, brutal kick to his stomach.

His eyes flew open, and they flicked around wildly, as he clutched at his stomach and gasped for breath. At last, as she drew back, into the glassy moonlight filtering in from where there had once been a window, Smith's eyes settled on her.

He froze, and Zephyr grinned her Evil grin again.

"Ka is not your friend, Smith. It has brought me to you, and now you will suffer."

He sat up slowly, regarding her with large, frightened eyes, and said nothing.

"You could still live." Zephyr said mildly. "But you would have to be very convincing, for you have stepped out of Ka's hands and into mine. I will decide, and if you explain a lie, you will die, but before you do, you will pray to the Gods many times that they take you from the agony."

Finally, Smith spoke up, in a tired, injured voice.

"I was afraid." He said simply. "I have often spoken of my hatred for the human race, saying they are a Virus, which I still believe, so when I started experiencing... _feelings_, I was obviously horrified. I thought that, if I got away from you, I could stop the horrid feelings I was having."

Zephyr looked down at him, her face a picture of fury and rancid disgust, and before she spoke her hateful words, she stepped closer to Smith, and spat in his face.

"You are a disgrace." She hissed. "To kill you would be a Mercy, and such a creature as you does not deserve Mercy. Pray for you goddamn A.I Soul, Smith, for I shall do Ka's bidding with great pleasure."


	6. Charyou Tree

**Disclaimer: I own none of the Matrix.**

**A/N: Just a few notes. Those of you, who have read the instalment of Stephen King's Dark Tower series called _Wizard and Glass_, will be familiar with the phrase _charyou tree_, and its translation. I never planned to steal that phrase, but the character of Zephyr has been inspired by said Dark Tower series, and so I thought it fit at the time. Also, sorry for the shortness of the chapter... longer chapters will come... this is building towards something, a big something, but what that is, I don't even know yet. **

"Go on, then." Smith said, looking at her calmly. "Kill if you will. If it is Ka, as you think it is, nothing could stop you."

"Yes. Very wise to just accept your fate, because it will come whether you accept it or not." Zephyr replied coldly, and bent down in front of Smith as he sat there in the dust, looking at her calmly, and without fear.

_Go on, then._ A Voice advised her. _Kill him. What, exactly, are you waiting for? The coming of time? The Wolves of the Calla? What?_

_Be gone, whatever you are._ She thought absently, and reached out towards Smith, yanking roughly at the collar of his shirt, indicating that she wanted him to stand.

Saying nothing, still regarding him with a blue gaze that was absent of fear, or anything, Smith rose. His gaze was blank, without emotion. In that moment, Smith looked like the all-destroying Agent he had once been.

"Say your prayers, Smith. Say them quick. Whatever God's there may be will not pity you, they will not spare you your penance of Eternal hell, but pray, just the same. There are worse things than the agony stretching into Eternity."

When Smith said nothing, Zephyr laughed harshly and drew her knife from where had been residing, in a scabbard on her right ankle, and approached him with it.

Muttering a prayer that came before any sacrifice in the Lore of her hometown, Zephyr whispered; "_Charyou tree._"

_Death for you, life for my crop. _Zephyr thought as she looked at Smith critically, preparing to drive the blade of her knife into his stomach, puncturing it, but _something was holding her back._

"Can't you do it?" Smith enquired mockingly. "Maybe it is not Ka for me to die, maybe it is Ka for you to find out you have lost the heart to kill the innocent."

"Innocent!" Zephyr cried, furious. "I've never killed anyone _innocent_ in my entire life! Every damned person, daemon or _dabukk_ whoever fell before me had it coming! Not one of that filth had a breath of innocent life in their god-for-saken shells!"

Her self-control gone, and an all consuming rage filling her mind, filling every inch of her, Zephyr charged at him, unaware on any sane level of what she was doing, and she drove her knife into his stomach, doing more than puncturing, it ripped, tore, and mutilated, and Smith dropped like a stone as blood started to spill from the wound in a sinister, killing torrent.


End file.
